Tuesday, March 22, 2011


For the majority of my teen life and for all of my post teen life I've wanted one thing more than anything else.  Let me preface this post with a little background on me.  I've been blessed with the worlds best group of friends.  I have literally had the same group of friends my entire life.  My friends from elementary school and I integrated with people we met in middle school and so on in high school and even after graduation.. most of us being 21 now still talk, hang out, and love each other.  

A little further than that.. I have the worlds best family as well.  I have two parents who are the best people in the entire world.  I have 5 siblings- each of them amaze me more and more everyday. 

The point of this background is to illustrate to you (mostly illustrate to me) how surrounded I am with people that love me.  I am surrounded by people that love me (I like saying it over and over)- and even more so people that I love and would do anything for.  

Over the years I've watched every single one of my friends and siblings move from relationship to relationship and some of them even finding their one and only.  I couldn't be happier for them.  

I've never been in a relationship.  I've watched and supported all of my best friends go in and out of them.  Watched them soak up the feeling of being wanted and wanting.  I've always wondered if it will ever be my turn.  

Until recently.  

What I want- I think may be right in front of me.  I'm starting to wonder if the friendships I have and the love that coincides with those, and the family I have with the tremendous love that comes from there.... is enough?

I know it would make my parents happy if I decide to live the law of chastity according to the church.  I know that there would be no room for the type of relationship I crave so badly within the church.  I also know there is no capacity for me to love someone in a traditional relationship.  

So help me. Is it enough?